Responding to life’s challenges
Everyone wants to enhance their quality of life. Everyone wants to be more fulfilled. But almost all of us get stuck at times in our limiting beliefs and emotional patterns. We make habits out of feeling frustrated, worried, sad or overwhelmed. But it is these disempowering habits that prevent us from what we are really capable of doing.
While we cannot control the events that happen in our lives, we can master how we experience these events. We are always going to encounter stressful times, but we can change our mindset about them by building emotional intelligence.
All you can control in life is how you respond to it
The external events over the last few years have taken the world by surprise. People have lost jobs, lost their health or even lost loved ones. Something happens that is outside our control, and it knocks us down. Stress, anger, sadness don’t come from the events or the fact that they happened. They come from the meaning that we give the events or those facts.
Of course, the terrible things that happen are real. But the question is, how are you going to allow that to shape your life? Are you going to let it tear you down? Or are you going to use it to empower and enlighten the way you go through life?
It’s all about the meaning that you give to the events and experiences of your life. Because when you come up with a new meaning, you can get a new perspective, and, ultimately, a new life.
Listen to your story
We unconsciously decide what events and experiences in our life mean. We do it all the time, but may not be aware of it. Take a downturn in the economy, for example. One person could interpret that as, “I’m going to be broke.” Another person might say, “This means I’m going to work harder and I’m going to be more creative about saving.”
What do you think the outcome of this thought pattern will be for each of these individuals? Is it apparent why each will have very different approaches to life, and why each will experience very different emotions? The emotions come from the meaning each person assigned to the event.
The default
If choosing the disempowering story sounds familiar, you are not alone. We all tell ourselves stories that make us miserable when we could be feeling joy. We make ourselves feel sad, worried, anxious, shameful, guilty, fearful and enraged on a consistent basis. Why? Because we are conditioned that way.
The human mind is always looking for:
• what you could lose,
• what you could have less of
• what you could never have.
Be grateful
It might seem counterintuitive, but it’s a matter of survival and of protection. You are biologically wired to prepare yourself for the worst at all times. It is up to you to take conscious control over your stories and the resulting emotions you experience.
The secret to this powerful change is to self coach and reframe one’s expectations to appreciation. If you do this, your whole life will change in that moment. And if you keep doing it, your life will change forever.
You’re in control
The choice is yours. What are you going to focus on? What story are you going to let guide your life? You get to choose what meaning to assign. This is the one power that you have right now in this moment that can change everything. Sit behind the wheel of your life and take back control. You are a beautiful and powerful human being with unlimited potential deserving of a joyful, fulfilled and successful life.
The only thing keeping you from getting what you want is yourself. The only thing keeping you from the joy you deserve is the disempowering story you keep telling yourself. But what if you decided right now to offer yourself a new story? What if everything was designed for you to actually have a greater life and have more to give and more to enjoy?
It’s time to change your perspective and ask yourself: What if everything that is happening in your life including the most painful and traumatic events, were happening “FOR YOU”, rather than “To YOU”?
If you want real freedom in your life, you must make a decision to stop allowing external events to shape your happiness. Become the master of meaning and finding the empowering meaning in anything and everything that comes your way. Real freedom comes when you make the decision to stop allowing external events shape your emotional experience.
Take Action
You can join me in one of the events held at ICE Café. These are opportunities to learn, share and inspire one another. The gatherings are for coaches, team leaders and professionals who want to develop further and add value to others. This and other free resources are available via this link https://icoachingeducation.com/resources/ for you to read at leisure.
Are you ready to discover your unique talents and learn skills and strategies to create better results at work and your personal life? If so, then join me at the next ICE Strength Workshop. You can sign up via the link https://icoachingeducation.com/strength-workshop/
